Let’s face it: motherhood is wonderful, fulfilling, and beautiful…but sexy? Rarely.  I recall those early, exhausted, blurry post-partum weeks, where engorged, sore breasts and puffy faces and bloated bellies were par for the course, and how very un-sexy I felt.  Every new mom feels that way, despite what the celebrity gossip mags say. You may be feeling as sexy and sexual as a wet dishrag right now, but there will come a point where you realize how cute your partner looks in those jeans again, and you’ll want to do something about that…believe me. Here are some ways to get your mojo back and how to feel sexy after baby. The two things are NOT mutually exclusive!

Be Good to Yourself–Splurge and Pamper Yourself a Little! Sure, you might be a bigger pants size than you were pre-pregnancy, but that doesn’t mean you don’t have something to flaunt. You’re a mom now, and your body is different, but that doesn’t mean it isn’t just as good as it was before–or even better! Treat yourself to a few new clothes that flatter your body: play up those fuller hips and more generous bust, or even better, some new lingerie! Buy a cute new purse (you won’t be hauling a diaper bag around ALL the time, after all), or a pair of cute new shoes or earrings. Get a massage, have your nails done or your hair cut and styled, take long bubble baths (enlist Dad’s help to nail down time for that!), or do whatever it takes to help you start to feel beautiful and desirable again. When you love yourself and feel sexy, it’s hard for others to disagree!

Take Your Body Back. No, you may never be exactly the same after pregnancy as you were before, but you can do something about getting fit, strong, and toned again. Exercise boosts energy levels, pumps you full of feel-good endorphins, and increases levels of hormones that make you feel and look better, so get moving! Take a yoga, pilates, dance, or martial arts class to make you feel strong, limber, and have better endurance. Those qualities will definitely help you in the bedroom!

Get Your Brain Working Again. All new moms know how easy it is to allow your brain to turn to oatmeal after having a new baby: the demands on your body and time are mind-numbing and not conducive to adult conversation, much less “adult interaction.” Wake yourself up! Read a novel, see a good movie, develop a new or existing hobby, get out with friends! Anything to get that brain working on something beyond feeding schedules and dirty diaper duty. Since the brain is the body’s primary sexual organ, once it’s revved up and ready to go, the rest of you won’t be far behind.

Have Some “Me Time”. This is not a date night for you and the hubby–get away from him and the baby, and spend some time by yourself or with your girlfriends. Remembering you’re not “just” a mom and spouse is important; decompress a little, let your hair down, and enjoy some independence. You’ll go home feeling lighter, freer, and will appreciate your kid(s) and your partner more, so you can be a sexy mommy.